Wednesday, August 13, 2008

getting ready or not- ramblings

last night as i laid in bed.. i couldn't sleep.. it was 130 am and i realized that i have NOTHING ready for this upcoming trip to China... "why" was the question that kept coming to mind.. we should be traveling next month and i am completely unprepared.
so not like me..
perhaps i have learned in my three prior trips to China; i don't need much. I will be taking med's, two pair of shoes and 3 pants and some shirts, some boy toys for my little ones... okay perhaps my hairspray.. what respectable girl doesn't carry her own hairspray?
everything else I know I can get and be happy with there. perhaps i am keeping my heart guarded b/c we were matched with daniel in july and it took til jan to travel.. i am praying that we travel in sept. i really wanted to be there for drews birthday in sept... it is so unlikely but God can do anything he chooses.. so i hold out hope for that. we were matched in june and had pa three weeks later.. we never received a pa or loa or anything for daniel.. just went from loi to ta.. and eight days later we were in china.. interesting how each of our three children's adoptions are so very different.
as i laid in bed i realized that the only thing i have is one suitcase,
60k northwest airline miles that i hope and pray we are able to use and my clothes that i haven't even picked out yet.
most of the time i am extremely out of character by being calm..i thank God for the peace he is giving me. then i get in the way and sometimes i am just beside myself waiting for CCAA to say 'come on over girl and bring this boy home!'.
I hope i can travel with three families that i have met.. we are all going to the same place and it would be amazing if it could happen..
interesting how I said i didn't want to adopt from Guatemala b/c i couldn't handle seeing a child's face for a year and waiting to go get that child.. but here God is saying you can handle this if you trust me, look to me and know that my plan is always perfect for you.. I have seen Drews face in my dreams since the Fall of 2006... and now we are about to be united.. in the Fall of 2008.. in China
Fall is my favorite time of year - it always has been..
so here i am with no plans, no bags packed and finally trusting the one who loves me best!

3 comments:

Alice said...

Praying that you get to go soon!!!!! That would be so awesome. I can't wait to see that boy in your arms and you BETTER update your blog EVERYDAY!!!!!!!!!!! It would kill me if you didn't.

Al

redmaryjanes said...

I hope you are able to go with your friends. Hopefully this fall!

Shelley said...

Hi Jill,
Thanks for stopping by my blog. It is so nice to meet you!!
I have been sitting here browsing through your past posts and I just had to comment on this one. We only made two trips, but I felt much the same way when we traveled the second time. I just sort of threw stuff in the suitcase and thought...Ah...whatever we forgot, we'll get there. It was just no big deal this time. Unlike 6 months of detailed preparation and methodical packing/unpacking/packing/rechecking/repacking/checking some more/unpacking to make sure we had __?___/packing again with our first trip.
I look forward to following your journey this time to your precious Drew. I wish I was coming with you...I can't wait for the girls to get old enough for us to go back!!
Blessings to you and your beautiful family~
Shelley